Guest Post: Procrastination Junkie…Oh Look! A Squirrel!

Ladies and gentleman. Freaks and weirdos. Writers, bloggers and procrastination junkies from all over. Please welcome my blogging buddy, Starr, from The Insomniac’s Dream to the blog today. She’s hilarious and swears a lot so we have that in common. And that writing thing too, obviously.

When Starr announced she was going to get back into blogging and do a blog tour involving her writing guest posts for several blogs, I eagerly jumped at the chance. I adore this woman even though that hilarious bitch has yet to consider me one of her blogging besties.

Now, if you have ever wondered what it’s like to be a writer and procrastination junkie, Starr gives us a hilarious look inside her writing world. As a fellow procrastination junkie, I get it. Big time.

Procrastination Junkie: What it's like to be a writer

6:00pm: Finally. Dinner is out the way, all of the dishes are done and the kitchen is clean. The Tinys are amusing themselves on Tiny Artist’s computer. I can start writing my guest blog. Before I can start writing I need to set up my writing space. I need a glass of water. Wait, is the filter on my pitcher going out? Let me replace that.

6:20pm: Water, check. Can of Diet Mt. Dew? Check. We’re getting low on soda; I should put another 12 pack in the fridge and add soda to the grocery list. What else are we running low on? I should add that, too. I should just write the entire grocery and menu list for the week. I’ll just organize the pantry and clean out the fridge while I’m at it. Now there are more dishes, better do those, and oh, the trash can is full, too. I’ll have to take out the trash and replace the bag.

7:30pm: Now, where was I? I need more water. Okay. Glass of water, can of soda, all set. Do I want a glass of wine? Nah, maybe later.   But I do need to pee.

7:33pm: I should change into my PJs while I’m at it. And wash my face too, since I’m already in the bathroom.

7:45pm: Now, about that glass of wine.

7:50pm: Where are my journals, notes, and pens? Why is it all mixed in with my work stuff? Wait, what’s this? I need to fix my To Do list for work tomorrow, this is a mess. What was I doing with this project, and what did I need to talk to this client about? I’ll just work for 20 minutes to get this straightened out for tomorrow.

8:25pm: I should double check my appointment book. I need to add in this week’s plans and next week’s too. Wait, are the bills due? I should pay those.

8:55pm: I need more water and a glass of wine. And to pee again.

8:58pm: Alright, I have my water and wine, not really in the mood for anymore soda. I have my journals, pens, and notes. Let’s fire this bitch up and get to writing. Oooh, look I have several FB notifications. I should check all of these. This conversation is interesting; I want to talk about this, too! Oh, and I should message Tamara. Hell, I should message all of my friends.

9:28pm: I should start writing my guest blog. But, before I do that, I need to choose the bio photo I’m going to use, rewrite my bio, and write my away message for my own blog.

9:50pm: Look, an FB notification.

10:00pm: I need to pee.

10:03pm: Oooh, FB message.

10:13pm: I need more water.

10:30pm: Awesome, bio is done. Let’s start on that guest blog. Wait, I should make the graphic for it first. I need to find a super face rocking photo for it. I’ll just look here, and here, and here.

11:00pm: Wait, FB notification.

11:10pm: I need to pee.

11:14pm: Search for a photo.

11:24pm: FB.

11:36pm: More water. And another glass of wine, too, what the hell.

11:38pm: I need to pee.

12:00am: More FB updates?

12:12am: Let’s look for that photo…

12:25am: Finally, time to make the graphic.

12:31am: Oooh, FB.

12:36am: I need to pee.

12:38am: I need more water.

12:40am: FB check.

12:50am: Be serious and make the graphic.

1:10am: Graphic is done! I need a break, my brain is tired. I’ll just check FB one more time and see what’s going on.

1:40am: Oh shit! I still need to write that guest blog.

1:41am: I need to pee.

1:43am: I need more water and another glass of wine.

1:48am: Let me just check this FB notification. Oh, what’s this? This article looks interesting, “Why You Suck at Guest Blogging”. I should read that. I am, after all, writing a guest blog. Now this is some good advice. I really should have my bio link to a landing page for readers to sign up for email subscriptions instead of my homepage.

2:00am: I need more water.

2:02am: I need to pee.

2:05am: I should go through these FB notifications.

2:18am: Let me just set up this new page on WP as a landing page for subscriptions…oh hell, I don’t even have a mail server set up or a monthly newsletter. I should do that. But, first I need to make a plan. I’ll make a list in my journal.

2:30am: I should check FB.

2:42am: I need to pee.

2:46am: I would like another glass of wine, but I should get more water too. I need to fill up this water pitcher.

2:56am: What was I doing? Oh yeah, writing a newsletter.

2:58am: I should check FB.

3:05am: I need to pee.

3:08am: Hmm…this newsletter is quite the endeavor, I should tackle this another night. I’ll just add it to my To Do List. Oh, what are all of these things on my To Do List? I should take care of some of these.

3:28am: I need more water.

3:33am: I need to pee.

3:37am: I’ll just check FB and then get back to my To Do List. Wait, what’s this To Do? “Write Guest Blog for Kim.” FUCK! Look how late it is. I need to write this.

3:39am: I need to pee.

3:44am: I need more water.

3:53am: I’ll just check FB one more time and then I really need to write this guest blog…


Bio ShotStarr works from her home in Pittsburgh as the content manager for OpenPotion Web Design. When she’s not busy raising her two teen boys to be the next best selling graphic novel team, she can be found writing non-stop (ever chasing that dream of publishing a book) or consistently avoiding writing.  Starr aspires to be a vampire when she grows up. Her claim to fame is her caustic wit, copious swears and an ongoing battle with insomnia. You can find her all over the internet and in a couple of books on Amazon.

Read more from Starr at The Insomniacs Dream. Like her on Facebook, follow her on Twitter, stalk her on G+, or pin her on Pinterest.


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